Projectors, due to their weak social energy, very often fall under the control of representatives of other, more energetically gifted Types. Especially Generators. And that’s how we observe Projector slavery. From the outside it may look unnoticeable, seem to be a very trusting relationship between people, but no one knows how this process looks from the Projector’s point of view. For example, a common situation. Two friends – one of them is a Generator, and the other is a Projector. And so the Generator friend gets a great offer – to spend a weekend at a club, in the company of other noisy people, music and alcohol. He certainly agrees, already anticipating a great holiday and of course, he invites his friend-Projector with him. The other one, though he tries to deny it, succeeds rather sluggishly – he is too unconvincing, especially when he is pressed. In the end, after a few minutes of pleading, cursing himself for it, the unhappy Projector agrees to spend his time the way his friend DID, although his plans were originally quite different.
This kind of “abusiveness” is far from uncommon. Such relationships are often formed in families, among friends or classmates, between colleagues at work, and sometimes even among people who do not know each other very well. Generators are the overwhelming majority on the planet, which means that in virtually every group it is they who will have the decisive influence. It is not surprising that in other people they want to see their own kind – the same energetic, noisy and fussy. And no one cares about the opinion of a quiet, reflective, often even timid Projector – they will decide everything for him and tell him what to do. And no one cares that he has to be the one who makes decisions and rules the process.
Being influenced by someone else is therefore an aspect of life that every Projector must be prepared for. Wherever you find yourself: with family or friends, at work or simply among like-minded people, they will always try to steer you. Do you want to stand back and just reflect? You will be grabbed by the hand and dragged into the thick of the crowd, forced to say something or tell you something under the gaze of the crowd. Do you want to talk to a person one-on-one? Ten more people will gather for your conversation, and everyone will start interrupting you and telling you exactly what you are wrong and why everything is wrong.
Even though a Projector is by nature designed to be sort of outside any group (a bit away so he can see the full picture), he will always be dragged inside by people of other Types. As soon as the Projector gets inside a large cluster, he flashes, and that’s it! He loses all his ability to handle other people’s energies and thinks only about himself, about how to meet other people’s expectations, so that he is not looked upon obliquely.
Therefore, Projectors very often become forced victims of toxic relationships – both with their parents and with their partners. People around them (especially if they are Generators) do not see and do not want to notice the Projector’s virtues, this innate power to control and guide. If you are a Projector, you should learn from an early age that neither your parents nor your lovers (with few exceptions) will be able to recognize your wisdom. And it’s not so much a denial of this trait of yours, no. You just live on completely different levels of perception of the world, that’s all.
And the most annoying thing is that other people, being unable to appreciate your potential, will look down on you! They do not take into account the knowledge you possess and the conclusions you came to in your head. No, they’re only evaluating your energy. For the other Types, life is a very simple thing. If a person is active, energetic, loud – then he knows exactly what to do and how to do it, so he is a leader! And the Projector, being quiet and not too emotional, is perceived condescendingly. And that is at best.
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That is why many Projectors, trying to manifest themselves in this world, stoop to the level of beggars. As if begging for alms, they turn to other people to be noticed by them and give them an opportunity to show their abilities. Not surprisingly, such a position “from below” predetermines in advance the fate of the hapless Projector. The fate of an ordinary cog in the mechanism, or, even worse, a pawn in someone’s hands. And this is where the worst emotion for the Projector comes from – the bitterness of not being able to fully realize his abilities and having to fulfill someone else’s silly whims.
But this is not just because of the toxic environment. Much depends on the Projectors themselves, on their ignorance of their own nature! Let us imagine that an ordinary Projector has lost his job and urgently needs another source of income. Having got used to live in a society of Generators he will do as they do – with his eyes bulging with fear he will look for any opportunity and grab the first available, begging for the job. And when he comes to the interview he will not behave as an equal part of the negotiations, asking for the appropriate payment for his services. No, such a Projector will initially put himself in the role of the one asking. What this roughly looks like: “For your payment, I am willing to do everything in my power!” That is, he will immediately put the initiative in someone else’s hands and be the one who accepts the terms, rather than imposing them.
But how should it really be? Here, the projector comes in for an interview and immediately says, “I like this, I don’t like that – I will have to change this, I want this and that, and I want this amount for my work. If you are satisfied with my terms – call me in a couple of days, while I think. Feel the difference? Immediately see where a man appreciates himself, and where he is ready to sell his guts for the shadow of an opportunity. And the point is not that you have to be arrogant and go over your head. You just need to be able to demand for yourself what you consider yourself worthy of.
Going back to the beginning of the article. If you are invited by someone somewhere – no need to rush to agree. Even if you’re being persuaded or pressured, even if you find it hard to say no. Because then it’s much harder when you find yourself in a place where you wouldn’t want to be or do something you wouldn’t want to do. And even if you do agree to something, you don’t miss the opportunity to work out the terms in a way that benefits you. The ideal phrase for this is “Yes, but…”. You have to know your own worth, and remember – if you’re invited to something, it’s you who are invited, your knowledge, skills, traits and talents. So in this situation, YOU become the one who makes the decision. And it’s better to make decisions that are beneficial to yourself, isn’t it?
Until the Projector realizes himself, understands his strengths and outstanding features, he will be forced to vegetate on the margins of life in the role of someone else’s “slave”. It is not always enough to understand one’s own traits – one must respect them as well as oneself. When a projector begins to respect his time and himself more than others’ opinions of him, when he is able to stand up to the crowd and defend his interests in spite of condemnation from outside, that is when he will begin to flourish. Only then will he be rewarded for his courage to be himself, rewarded with success in whatever he puts his hand to.
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