There is a widespread opinion among those who study Human Design that in the union of Projector and Manifestor it is the latter who is far more interested in the preservation and development of the relationship. After all Manifestor is the Type who always remains immersed in himself, in his own thoughts and actions, and is rarely interested in the life of another person. Even if that person is his partner in marriage.
Relationships between these two Types can cause a lot of problems for both of them. But if built correctly and consciously, with a full understanding of both the strengths and weaknesses of their nature, the same union may well become a source of inspiration from which both people will draw strength.
Manifestors by nature are strong, independent individuals, for whom the generally accepted rules and principles are no more than unnecessary fetters, from which they want to get rid with all their might.
Projectors, on the other hand, look deeply into the soul of other people and try to direct other people’s resources in the most favourable direction. And the behavior of Projectors, their “caring” and “mentoring” often become the very stumbling block bringing discord to the alliance of Manifestors with them.
The auras of the Projectors and the Manifestors are very different, if not opposite. Where one wants to close off and stay in his inner world, the other is constantly trying to “penetrate” this space, and it doesn’t matter whether this is done for good purposes or not.
Let’s take a closer look at what problems the Projector may experience when he or she builds a relationship with Manifestor.
The first, and most obvious, is the pointlessness of the Projector’s attempts to “probe” his partner’s aura. It is very natural for the Projector to try to understand as deeply as possible the person with whom he is in constant interaction. But Manifestor literally suppresses these attempts at the subconscious level – he may not tell about his plans, about what he thinks and feels, what thoughts are hovering in his head, etc. As a result, a situation often arises when even after many years of marriage the Projector suddenly discovers that he does not understand at all the person with whom he has lived together for so long.
The second point follows directly from the first. Since the Projector will not be able to understand and recognize the potential of his partner, he will not be able to realize his own destiny by channeling the Manifestor’s potential either. Moreover, even if by some miracle the Projector recognizes the nature of his lover, the latter may simply refuse advice, reasoning that he himself knows better. Therefore, the Projector will experience a constant feeling of bitterness from the fact that he either does not understand how exactly he should help his partner, or from the fact that his help will turn out to be unclaimed.
But Manifestor himself may also undoubtedly have reasons to be dissatisfied with being paired with the Projector.
The most important problem for Manifestor in his relationship with the Projector is his attempts to “point” the latter. Although it is natural for the Projector to help others find the right path, Manifestor would rather be wrong ten times but do it of his own free will. For Manifestors it is not so important to do right or wrong – it is much more important that they can feel full responsibility for their own actions. And it is possible only if they make their own choices, without turning to the hints and advice of others.
One more annoying thing for Manifestors can be the fact that Projectors are often very much focused on relationships. Sometimes even too much. Freedom-loving Manifestors do not like to be forced into something, so attempts to build some kind of joint boundaries or even planning common leisure time can be perceived by them as an encroachment on their freedom
Another important aspect is the unspoken struggle for leadership. Both Projectors and Manifestors are both leaders by nature. In spite of the fact that their methods of management are fundamentally different in their essence, on the subconscious level the struggle for a place in the hierarchy will always be felt. And at times, even the most insignificant advice and cues of the Projector are perceived by the Manifestor as an encroachment on his leadership position.
Undoubtedly, in spite of all the difficulties in mutual relations, truly successful and productive alliances are formed between Manifestors and Projectors, if they understand the mechanics of Types. The main thing for a Projector is to be patient and not to interfere himself with his unsolicited advice. It is necessary to wait for the moment when Manifestor himself in this or that form will ask for help, and only after that provide him the requested support. But Manifestor must learn to inform his partner before doing something. In this way, he will not be in trouble (because he still reserves the right to do what he thinks is necessary, even if he meets with disapproval), and the Projector will feel that his opinion is important and will not feel as if he is “left out” of the relationship.